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liviu_lb
post 27 Mar 2008, 12:50
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Marfa! Ce repede merge ala verde!


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MuciX
post 27 Mar 2008, 12:50
Post #4382


sunt un om bun


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QUOTE(BlaueCorsa @ 27 Mar 2008, 10:03)
Iata cum se punea problema pedepsirii violului la 1504:
*



Pai cel mai vechi document gasit, scris in limba romana, nu era scrisoarea lui Neacsu din Campulung (1521)?


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Shush
post 27 Mar 2008, 12:52
Post #4383


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QUOTE(liviu_lb @ 27 Mar 2008, 12:50)
Marfa! Ce repede merge ala verde!
*


Nu are nicio sansa in fala celui albastru tongue.gif


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Seat Leon 2008 Reference 1.6 - Bv-29-Trei Litere
Yamaha YZF-R125 2009 - Bv-88-Aceleasi Trei Litere
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22CMM
post 27 Mar 2008, 13:21
Post #4384


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pariez pe rosu! si pulsez cu:

Un tip viziteaza o fabrica de diverse produse din latex.
Prima data a remarcat masina de produs biberoane, datorita zgomotului de "fssss-pac" pe care il facea.
Ghidul explica:
- Acel fasait este cauciucul pe care-l injecteaza, iar "pac"-ul este dat de intepatura care i se face in varf.
Ceva mai incolo intra in sectia de produs prezervative.
Un zgomot infernal si aici: "fsss-fsss-fsss-pac".
Intrigat, omul nostru intreaba:
- Bine-bine, am inteles de ce face "fsss", dar de ce se mai aude si "pac"?
- Normal, aparatul functioneaza ca si cel de produs biberoane, la al patrulea prezervativ ii trage o gaura.
- Asta-i buna! Dati gauri la prezervative?
- Da! Face bine la afacerea cu biberoane!


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vis-a-vis
post 27 Mar 2008, 13:52
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QUOTE(MuciX @ 27 Mar 2008, 12:50)
Pai cel mai vechi document gasit, scris in limba romana, nu era scrisoarea lui Neacsu din Campulung (1521)?
*


S-a transmis pe cale orala tongue.gif


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tribunul
post 27 Mar 2008, 14:12
Post #4386


Sunt inofensiv, dar gandul meu e criminal


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- Mamico, mi-ai spus, ca ingerii au aripi si pot zbura, da?
- Desigur, scumpa mea.
- Aseara, cand tu nu erai, am auzit cum tata ii spunea menajerei 'Ingeras'. Ea cand o sa zboare?
- Maine dimineata, scumpo, maine dimineata!


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"Consumul exagerat de mitocanie si neam prost dauneaza grav sanatatii ..."
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BlaueCorsa
post 27 Mar 2008, 15:28
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QUOTE(MuciX @ 27 Mar 2008, 12:50)
Pai cel mai vechi document gasit, scris in limba romana, nu era scrisoarea lui Neacsu din Campulung (1521)?
*



Ba da, si limba in cancelariile din Valahia si Moldova era slavona. Na, mi-ai stricat de tot bancu'. mad.gif


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xcss
post 27 Mar 2008, 15:38
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Lasa ca strumeleagu-nvartosat face toti banii 04.gif


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MuciX
post 27 Mar 2008, 17:48
Post #4389


sunt un om bun


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QUOTE(BlaueCorsa @ 27 Mar 2008, 15:28)
Na, mi-ai stricat de tot bancu'.  mad.gif
*



Da, l-am stricat, la modul ca il postasem inaintea ta la bancuri pe reno tongue.gif


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AlexV
post 27 Mar 2008, 18:02
Post #4390


Admin?


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From: Bucuresti
QUOTE(BodoC @ 23 Mar 2008, 13:34)
Nu e banc. Unde e gresala?
Teorema 4 = 3
Demonstratie:
Fie a + b = c
De unde 4a - 3a + 4b - 3b = 4c - 3c
4a + 4b - 4c = 3a + 3b - 3c
4 (a + b - c) = 3 (a + b - c)
4 = 3
Q.E.D
*



hai ma, e chiar asa de greu? ti-am selectat cu rosu unde e greseala.


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Sudsemnatu
post 27 Mar 2008, 20:39
Post #4391


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From: Bucuresti



deci...daca nu mai puteti de ras si obositi ...


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22CMM
post 28 Mar 2008, 07:38
Post #4392


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Bula impreuna cu niste prieteni erau in metrou.
O femeie in varsta se apropie de Bula si ii spune:
- Mai baiete, pe tine nu te-au invatat la scoala sa dai locul unei femei mai in varsta?
- Te dor picioarele, mamaie?
- Da!
- Matale, cand erai tanara, dadeai locul unor persoane in varsta?
- Da!
- Ei, vezi? D-aia te dor picioarele!


Guvernul Basesecu


This post has been edited by 22CMM: 28 Mar 2008, 07:40

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Muttley
post 28 Mar 2008, 07:53
Post #4393


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Era dragut si celalalt...

O batranica se urca-n autobuz, aglomeratie. Bula, de pe scaun, o-ntreaba:
- Mamaie, vrei sa stai jos?
Baba, cu o voce stinsa...
- Da...
Bula...
- Da, ok, dar unde?!?


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csiri_biri_kodak
post 28 Mar 2008, 09:33
Post #4394


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Un cuplu se duce la un targ de vite pt. a cumpara un taur. La primul taur femeia intreaba:
-Spuneti-mi ce inseamna ca acest taur are medalia de bronz?
-Pai asta inseamna ca se poate inperechea de 4 ori pe zi...
-Aia da! Auzi tata ce zice omul, auzi?
Merg mai departe si vad un alt taur medaliat cu argint, si femeia intreaba:
-Spuneti-mi ce inseamna ca acest taur este medaliat cu argint?
-Asta inseamna ca acest taur se poate imperechea si de 5 ori pe zi!
-OAUUU! Auzi tata, auzi?
Dupa ce se mai plimba vreo 10 minute gasesc un taur medaliat cu aur, si femeia intreaba direct:
-Si acest taur de cate ori poate pe zi???
-Acesta poate si de 8 ori!!
-Auzi tata, auzi?????
Barbatul ne mai rezistand la apropouri, intreaba:
-...si ia spuneti, tot cu aceeasi vaca?
-NU! NU! intotdeauna cu alta.
-AUZI MAMA, AUZI???


Dispare sotia, si sotul foarte ingrijorat o tot cauta 2 zile. A treia zi dimineata apare sotia ca din senin se repede la frigider si incepe sa infulece mancarea. Cand o vede sotul o intreaba:
-Unde ai fost timp de 2 zile?? eu te-am tot cautat...
-Vezi tu, cum veneam eu acasa s-a oprit langa mine o dubita si 2 insi m-au fortat in ea ... si cu inca 2 insi ma violeaza de o saptamana!!!!
-Pai cum asa??? ... de o saptamana??? dar nu ai disparut decat de 2 zile?!?!?
-A da, acum am venit acasa sa manac ceva si ma duc inapoi.


Un barbat soseste la gradinita:
-Am venit dupa copilu meu.
-Bine, si cum il cheama?
-Nu-i tot una? Maine oricum il aduc inapoi.


Un om la interviu de agajare:
-Buna ziua! Ma numesc Ion.
-Buna ziua! nu stiu pe unde ati mai lucrat, dar la noi nu ne adresam celuilalt cu prenume ci cu numele de familie...ca si Pop, Dunca, Maior s.a.m.d. Eu pt. Dvs. sunt Domnul Director Ghise. Deci cum va numit?
Omul cu o voce abia auzita:
-Pai ... ma numesc Scumpule, Scumpule Ion.
-Bine Ion, sa vorbim despre partea financiara....

This post has been edited by csiri_biri_kodak: 28 Mar 2008, 09:38


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! Fiecare trebuie sa inceapa de undeva !
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tribunul
post 28 Mar 2008, 10:02
Post #4395


Sunt inofensiv, dar gandul meu e criminal


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Nimeni nu moare virgin...viata i-o trage fiecaruia cel putin o data!


--------------------
Renault "Megane" Scenic 2 2007
"Copiii sunt mainile cu care ne prindem de rai."
"Consumul exagerat de mitocanie si neam prost dauneaza grav sanatatii ..."
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22CMM
post 28 Mar 2008, 10:10
Post #4396


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Pierdut soacra! Se declara nula! Recompensa celui ce o pastreaza!


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Zboara puiule, zboara...!
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iubitordedacie
post 28 Mar 2008, 10:57
Post #4397


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From: Bucuresti
Se incheie Cina cea de Taina. Vine ospatarul cu nota de plata la Iisus. Se uita Iisus la nota si inlemneste, in pragul infarctului: 30 de arginti.
- Ioane, ai tu cumva 30 de arginti?
- Nu, doamne, am dat toti banii la saraci.
- Andrei, ai tu cumva 30 de arginti?
Acelasi raspuns.
- Petre?
Petre ridica din umeri, nu are. Ultimul apostol:
- Iuda, ai tu cumva treizeci de arginti?
- N-am, Doamne... dar am o idee...


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Dacie Berlina 2010 - BB-KING
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Micutzu_BH
post 28 Mar 2008, 11:32
Post #4398


Driving around


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Cum sa devii EMO icon_mrgreen.gif



Cam lung filmul dar merita vazut pana la capat! icon_mrgreen.gif

This post has been edited by Micutzu_BH: 28 Mar 2008, 11:37


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bion
post 28 Mar 2008, 12:21
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QUOTE(MuciX @ 27 Mar 2008, 17:48)
Da, l-am stricat, la modul ca il postasem inaintea ta la bancuri pe reno tongue.gif
*


Buey de ce esti rau? Zburatorul nostru fiind moldovean stia ceva cu 1504. Acu` ca era pravila cu taierea sau moartea lu` Voda Stefan astea`s mizilicuri wink.gif


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Dacia SLZ Scala 2003 - TM54
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Cãci n-au pãreche-n lume blestemaþii
Crîºmarii care toarnã apã-n vin !
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22CMM
post 28 Mar 2008, 12:38
Post #4400


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-draga mea in fiecare seara adorm cu tine in cand!
- wub.gif
-dar tot pe secretara o visez!

-draga mea aseara n-am putut sa adorm fara tine!
- biggrin.gif
- asa ca am chemat-o pe vecina!


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Dacia Super Nova 2003 - PH22CMM
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ag02cws
post 28 Mar 2008, 13:43
Post #4401


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http://www.livefeeds.gr/644589663/english/
Nu uitati prefixul tarii 407xxxxxxxx


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Dacia 1310 L 1994 / Dacia Sandero 1.4 MPI 2008 / Kia Cee'd 2008
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tribunul
post 28 Mar 2008, 13:57
Post #4402


Sunt inofensiv, dar gandul meu e criminal


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From: Micul Paris
Reclama la Vodafone?


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"Consumul exagerat de mitocanie si neam prost dauneaza grav sanatatii ..."
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C@talin
post 28 Mar 2008, 14:05
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nu ma suna sad.gif


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Range Rover V8 5.0 Vogue SE - B 666 IAD
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tribunul
post 28 Mar 2008, 14:10
Post #4404


Sunt inofensiv, dar gandul meu e criminal


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Ar trebui sa sune si sa vorbeasca cu tine.


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Renault "Megane" Scenic 2 2007
"Copiii sunt mainile cu care ne prindem de rai."
"Consumul exagerat de mitocanie si neam prost dauneaza grav sanatatii ..."
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C@talin
post 28 Mar 2008, 14:12
Post #4405


Dealer autorizat droguri/Stil romantic: Sef.


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From: cucu
pe mine nu ma suna nimeni si am incercat si cu 407 si cu +407


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Range Rover V8 5.0 Vogue SE - B 666 IAD
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Micutzu_BH
post 28 Mar 2008, 14:21
Post #4406


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OFFTOPIC: Probabil depinde pe ce retea esti! Eu am V. si m-a sunat! Geniala reclama! biggrin.gif

ONTOPIC: Banc, banc / Mat(z)a e pe tanc! / Tancu-i pe autobus / Ghici cine e mai sus?

LE OFF: Am pus-o sa-l sune pe un prieten de pe O. si l-a sunat! radmasa.gif

This post has been edited by Micutzu_BH: 28 Mar 2008, 14:33


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Dacia Logan Ambition - 2005
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tribunul
post 28 Mar 2008, 14:27
Post #4407


Sunt inofensiv, dar gandul meu e criminal


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From: Micul Paris
De ce fetele coboara privirea cind primesc o declaratie de dragoste?
- Ca sa verifice daca e adevarat...


--------------------
Renault "Megane" Scenic 2 2007
"Copiii sunt mainile cu care ne prindem de rai."
"Consumul exagerat de mitocanie si neam prost dauneaza grav sanatatii ..."
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BlaueCorsa
post 28 Mar 2008, 14:38
Post #4408


Membru cu Prafuitor


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QUOTE(bion @ 28 Mar 2008, 12:21)
Buey de ce esti rau? Zburatorul nostru fiind moldovean stia ceva cu 1504. Acu` ca era pravila cu taierea sau moartea lu` Voda Stefan astea`s mizilicuri  wink.gif
*



Auzi nene... chiar nu reusesti sa intelegi ca m-am saturat de bancurile tale retardate? Te freaca grija de persoana mea? N-ai alta treaba?

On-topic:

English signs in China (these are genuine)

In a Beijing hotel lobby - The lift is being fixed for next day. During that time we regret that you will be unbearable.
In a Shanghai hotel elevator: Please leave your values at the front desk.
In a Hangzhou hotel: The flattening of underwear with pleasure is the job of the chambermaid.
In a Jilin hotel: You are very invited to take advantage of the chambermaid.
In a Wuxi dry cleaner: Please drop your trousers here for best results.
Outside a Tianjin clothing shop: Order your summer suits quick. Because is big rush we will execute customers in strict rotation.
In a Xian tailor shop: Ladies may have a fit upstairs.
In a Guilin hotel: Because of impropriety of entertaining guests of the opposite sex in the bedroom it is suggested that the lobby be used for this purpose.
An ad by Kunming dentist: Teeth extracted by the latest methodists.
In a Hangzhou zoo: Please do not feed animals. If you have suitable food give it to the guard on duty.
From a karaoke bar song list in Suzhou: I'd Like to Teach the Wound to Sing; What Kind of Foot Am I.
In a Taiyuan bar: Special cocktails for the ladies with nuts.
Hainan airline ticket office: We take your bags and send them to all directions.
In a Huashan temple: It is forbidden to enter a woman. Even a foreigner if dressed as a man.
In a restaurant menu in Harbin: Salad a firm's own make; Limpid red beet soup with cheesy dumplings in the form of a finger;Beef rashers beaten up in the country people's fashion.

This post has been edited by BlaueCorsa: 28 Mar 2008, 14:39


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Dacia / Renault Duster / Captur 2018 Confort / 2015 Authentique
Mon amour, tu es la lumière de mes jours...
sans numéro! sans numéro! sans numéro!
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xcss
post 28 Mar 2008, 14:44
Post #4409


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What Kind of Foot Am I radmasa.gif


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Mit der Dummheit kämpfen Götter selbst vergebens.
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argon
post 28 Mar 2008, 14:46
Post #4410


Mesaj semiautomat


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QUOTE(ag02cws @ 28 Mar 2008, 13:43)
http://www.livefeeds.gr/644589663/english/
Nu uitati prefixul tarii 407xxxxxxxx
*




genial radmasa.gif va dati seama ca 2 ore i-am bagat pe toti din agenda de pe vodafone radmasa.gif


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Renault Laguna 2007 - 2.0 DCI 16v 180
Fara turbo, viata e pustiu.
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DaciaClub - Reno Bot
post Reguli topic / Topic rules
Post #


Mesaj automat
Topicul este dedicat bancurilor. NU MAI ATASATI FILME sau LINK-uri.
Cei in cauza vor fi avertizati si posturile sterse.


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